I need to up my meds

Seriously.

Did you read my blog about the issue with my class text? If you haven't, go read it because this explosion might not make sense. So I went to the school bookstore to spend my $100 on the new edition of the text that is required for my Philosophy class. Guess what? Anyone? Nobody? Oh yes that's right, they have the same edition as the one I purchased online. Hmmmm. So I ask the nice lady wanting to help me. She goes to ask the manager about the new edition that the instructor insists we have. Guess what? They tell me that the instructor listed the new edition for FALL not summer. Nice to know that the right hand is aware of the left hand and what it's doing. So...I'm keeping the text I have. What a friggen waste of time.

The following occured on July 10, 2007 at approx. 11:15 a.m:

Setting: Panera Bread
Characters: Mom - Michelle
Son #1- L
Son #2-O
Senerio: Mom is eating a passion fruit bagel and boys asked for and received a choco-nut bagel. L is unhappy with choice but mom holds her ground and tells him that's what he wanted, that's what he got, eat it or not but he's not getting another choice and he sure as hell isn't getting hers. O is eating the bagel without complaint. Eating ends, parties are getting ready to leave to run additional errands before Mom has to go home to sleep as she works midnights tonite. The following conversation occurs:

Mom: "O, do you have to go potty?"
O: "Yes"
Mom: "L, do you have to go potty?"
L: "Yes"
Mom: "Good, let's all go so we can leave. I have lots to do and only a short amount of time to do it."
(all go into the bathroom, L pees, O stands there but does nothing but play with package.)
Mom: "O, I thought you said you had to go potty"
O: "I do"
Mom: "Then GO and stop fooling around."
O: "O-tay"
(all stand there waiting. L starts chanting "O pee pee, O pee pee, O pee pee" it echos throughout the SMALL restroom)
Mom: " L! Knock it off!"
L: "Sorry, I thought it would help O pee"
Mom: "O, do you have to pee?"
O: "No"
Mom (getting mad): "Then why did you tell me you had to potty?"
O: " I dunno"

Senerio: In traffic, EXACTLY one mile down the road from Panera Bread on the way to the Post Office.

O: "MOM! I GOTTA GO POOP!"
Mom: "What? Are you kidding me?"
O: "I GOTTA GO NOW!"
Mom (furious and yelling): "WE WERE JUST ON THE POTTY AND YOU TOLD ME YOU DIDN'T HAVE TO GO, NOW YOU NEED TO POOP?? YOU'D BETTER HOLD IT YOUNG MAN 'TIL I CAN FIND A BATHROOM!"
(O is whimpering in the backseat, Luke is chanting "O is in trouble, O is in trouble, O is in trouble" Mom yells at L to "SHUT UP" and L say's "We don't say shut up Mom, remember?" Mom is wondering why she had kids as she whips into "Iraqs best" gas station. Everyone gets out of van and proceeds to "bathroom".)
Mom: "Touch NOTHING! Do you both hear me? TOUCH NOTHING IN HERE!!!!"
O and L: "Ok"
(Mom whips O's shorts down and plops him on the toilet and waits. And waits. And waits.)
Mom: "O, do you have to poop?"
O: "Yes"
Mom: "Then POOP!"
O: "I can't, L is looking at me"
Mom: "L, turn around for God's sake and stop looking at your brother."
(Mom and L are both turned around when a rendition of "Old MacDonald had a farm" breaks out from the toilet.)
Mom(YELLING): "O!!!! ARE YOU GOING TO POOP?"
O: "No"
Mom: "You don't have to poop?"
O: "Nope"
Mom (fists clenched and through gritted teeth): "Then why did you tell me in the van that you had to poop."
O: "I dunno"
L: "Beat his ass Mom"
(Mom so freakin' mad right now at O that she doesn't correct L's use of swear word. She whips O off toilet, yanks up his shorts and washes his hands. Proceeds to drag him to van.)

Senerio: All parties are home. Dad is awake and awaiting the kids with the door open.
Dad: "Did you guys have fun?"
L: "Nope, Mom is super mad at O and I think she's going to give him up for adoption for real this time"
(O enters house crying but then see's truck and runs to play. Dad looks at Mom who growls as she enters house. Dad in a moment of intelligence, says nothing to Mom)

Senerio: Exactly 10 minutes after arriving home. Mom is at kitchen table, L is watching Poke'mon, Dad is watching CNN and O is playing with truck.

O: " I went pee"
Dad: "That's good son, did you wash your hands?"
O: "Nope, but my penis is wet."
Dad: "What?"
O: "My penis and shorts are wet."
L (screams): "O PEED ON THE FLOOR AND I JUST STEPPED IN IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Mom's head whips around to look toward chaos, there she see's a huge puddle RIGHT IN FRONT OF THE G.D. BATHROOM. She makes eyecontact with O, with a growl she lunges from her chair with her arms outstretched and hands in a choking position toward him. Dad tries to intercept Mom before she makes contact with O......

Tape ends.