STAY OFF MY BLOG!!
I use this blog to vent about various things in my life. You are one of those things. You hanging around here is like reading my diary. Trust me when I say that you NEED me to have this outlet for my frustrations. If you insist on sticking around then you must understand the following:
1. Nothing, I repeat, N-O-T-H-I-N-G you read here can be used against me. Everything written is property of ME.
2. You are NOT allowed to comment to me under my own name. It fucks me up. I start thinking that I'm writing notes to myself that I don't remember writing. Sign in and comment under your own name.
3. You will NOT, under any circumstances, post our sex videos. That's crossing the line.
4. I DO NOT live and breathe garbage day. I just don't want the fucking trash sitting around for two weeks because you don't take the initiative to take it out the day before.
Love,
Your Wife
PS: I still don't want you hanging around here.
Sunday, November 30, 2008
Saturday, November 29, 2008
Dinner's Ready!
This is so good.
Tangy Pork Chop Stuffing Bake
6 bone-in pork chops (3-1/2 lb.)
1 pkg. (6 oz.) STOVE TOP Stuffing Mix for Pork
1 can (16 oz.) whole berry cranberry sauce
3/4 cup KRAFT Original Barbecue Sauce
2 Tbsp. brown sugar
PREHEAT oven to 350ºF. Cook chops in skillet on medium heat 5 min. on each side or until browned on both sides. Meanwhile, prepare stuffing in large saucepan as directed on package.
PLACE chops in 13x9-inch baking dish; set aside. Mix cranberry sauce, barbecue sauce and sugar. Add to stuffing; mix lightly. Spoon evenly over chops.
BAKE 30 min. or until chops are cooked through (160ºF).
I got a whole lotta bitching to do....
~Why the hell am I sick AGAIN?????? WHY??????? Bob Saget! I haven't been sick like this in friggen YEARS! It starts in my head and ends up in my chest. It's like I'm coughing up knives. Srsly. I'm done with this. D-O-N-E.
~ Riddle me this. If Cities, Townships, Counties...whatever... are having such financial issues, why the HELL are they wasting hundreds vs. thousands of dollars mailing senseless brochures toting the educational system of the city that I live in AND have a child in? What a friggen WASTE of resources and tax payer dollars. That pisses me off. I'm gonna start "returning to sender" that shit...maybe they'll get the message. Maybe I'll just "return to sender" alllll the friggen junk ass mail that I get. How fun. I shall start today.
~Why in the HELL am I the only one who remembers garbage day? Srsly. WTF. Why does my friggen husband forget it's garbage day Every.Friggen.Week. We've lived here 4.5 years for fucks sake. You're telling me that it hasn't formed a memory yet? Sometimes I wanna pile all the friggen trash in his car Tuesday night to remind him that Wednesday is garbage day. I swear to Bob I'd do it but for the fact that I drive that car too and don't wanna smell rotten chicken all the way to Tim Horton's.
~On the subject of garbage day, why am I the only one in my neighborhood who's recycling bin is overflowing? There are families that are double/triple the size of mine in this area and I'd say 80% of the recycling bins are barely 1/2 full. My city has had mandatory recycling for YEARS. Now more than ever the company takes almost ALL plastics and the usual recycling items. It really irritates me because if I'M doing my share to keep this planet clean then the rest of the lazy asses around here should too.
Off the bitch box. Soon too return.
~ Riddle me this. If Cities, Townships, Counties...whatever... are having such financial issues, why the HELL are they wasting hundreds vs. thousands of dollars mailing senseless brochures toting the educational system of the city that I live in AND have a child in? What a friggen WASTE of resources and tax payer dollars. That pisses me off. I'm gonna start "returning to sender" that shit...maybe they'll get the message. Maybe I'll just "return to sender" alllll the friggen junk ass mail that I get. How fun. I shall start today.
~Why in the HELL am I the only one who remembers garbage day? Srsly. WTF. Why does my friggen husband forget it's garbage day Every.Friggen.Week. We've lived here 4.5 years for fucks sake. You're telling me that it hasn't formed a memory yet? Sometimes I wanna pile all the friggen trash in his car Tuesday night to remind him that Wednesday is garbage day. I swear to Bob I'd do it but for the fact that I drive that car too and don't wanna smell rotten chicken all the way to Tim Horton's.
~On the subject of garbage day, why am I the only one in my neighborhood who's recycling bin is overflowing? There are families that are double/triple the size of mine in this area and I'd say 80% of the recycling bins are barely 1/2 full. My city has had mandatory recycling for YEARS. Now more than ever the company takes almost ALL plastics and the usual recycling items. It really irritates me because if I'M doing my share to keep this planet clean then the rest of the lazy asses around here should too.
Off the bitch box. Soon too return.
Tuesday, November 25, 2008
Locked, cocked and ready to go!
My Christmas cards are ready to go! I have a tradition that I mail them out Thanksgiving morning so most receive them by the weekend or so. Last years Disney trip threw a wrench into my annual Christmas card ritual but I actually did have all my envelopes addressed and stamped in Florida with me ready for the picture to be printed and mailed out but we were too busy with everything so I just had to wait 'til we got home. This year I got my game back on though.
I'm also planning the annual Black Friday outing with friends. Nothing says "It's the most wonderful time of the year" than adults fighting over Wii games or being rammed in the back of the ankles with numerous Walmart carts. I truly know what cattle feels like heading to the slaughter and it ain't pretty. However, like the herd mentality, I go back every year for the same abuse. I will say that most of the ad's I've seen have been crap. I did "hear" that if you see a toy or something at ToysRUs or Target, buy it THEN because both retailers aren't planning on anymore deliveries before Christmas. This could be heresay at Target but the CEO of TRU confirmed it. No one wants to get stuck with all that extra Christmas stock.
I'm also planning the annual Black Friday outing with friends. Nothing says "It's the most wonderful time of the year" than adults fighting over Wii games or being rammed in the back of the ankles with numerous Walmart carts. I truly know what cattle feels like heading to the slaughter and it ain't pretty. However, like the herd mentality, I go back every year for the same abuse. I will say that most of the ad's I've seen have been crap. I did "hear" that if you see a toy or something at ToysRUs or Target, buy it THEN because both retailers aren't planning on anymore deliveries before Christmas. This could be heresay at Target but the CEO of TRU confirmed it. No one wants to get stuck with all that extra Christmas stock.
Saturday, November 22, 2008
Why? Why, why, why?
So I was at a friend's blog this morning and I read how she made this amazing roasted chicken so I thought I'd check it out and since it came rated so highly, put it on the menu for next week. All was good until I got to this:
But I take the chicken butt for myself. I could never understand why my brothers always fought over that triangular tip—until one day I got the crispy, juicy fat myself. These are the cook's rewards.
Why? Why, why, why? I was alllll in 'til the "chicken butt....crispy, juicy fat". Am I the only person that doesn't find this even remotely appetizing? In fact, I'm down right repulsed by it. Why can't Zebra cakes repulse me? Or how 'bout those Espresso Brownies. Why can't I want to rebate those while thinking of them?
This sentence almost fixes it for me...almost, "Slather the meat with fresh butter. Serve with mustard on the side and, if you wish, a simple green salad." Anything w/butter is better. Maybe I'll still try it.
But I take the chicken butt for myself. I could never understand why my brothers always fought over that triangular tip—until one day I got the crispy, juicy fat myself. These are the cook's rewards.
Why? Why, why, why? I was alllll in 'til the "chicken butt....crispy, juicy fat". Am I the only person that doesn't find this even remotely appetizing? In fact, I'm down right repulsed by it. Why can't Zebra cakes repulse me? Or how 'bout those Espresso Brownies. Why can't I want to rebate those while thinking of them?
This sentence almost fixes it for me...almost, "Slather the meat with fresh butter. Serve with mustard on the side and, if you wish, a simple green salad." Anything w/butter is better. Maybe I'll still try it.
Friday, November 21, 2008
Fat Ass Friday
Oh yummmmmy. Srsly, you won't be disappointed.
Nonstick vegetable oil cooking spray
Preheat oven to 350 degrees F. Spray a 9 by 13-inch baking pan with nonstick spray. Whisk 1/3 cup of water, oil, eggs, and 2 tablespoons espresso powder in a large bowl to blend. Add the brownie mix. Stir until well blended. Stir in the chocolate chips. Transfer the batter to the prepared baking pan. Bake until a toothpick inserted into the center of the brownies comes out with a few moist crumbs attached, about 35 minutes. Cool completely.
Espresso Brownies
Serves:
36 bite-size brownies
Serves:
36 bite-size brownies
Nonstick vegetable oil cooking spray
1/3 cup plus 2 tablespoons water
1/3 cup vegetable oil
2 large eggs
2 tablespoons plus 2 teaspoons espresso powder
1 (19.8-ounce) box brownie mix (recommended: Duncan Hines)
3/4 cup semisweet chocolate chips
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
1 1/2 cups powdered sugar
1 tablespoon unsalted butter, room temperature
Preheat oven to 350 degrees F. Spray a 9 by 13-inch baking pan with nonstick spray. Whisk 1/3 cup of water, oil, eggs, and 2 tablespoons espresso powder in a large bowl to blend. Add the brownie mix. Stir until well blended. Stir in the chocolate chips. Transfer the batter to the prepared baking pan. Bake until a toothpick inserted into the center of the brownies comes out with a few moist crumbs attached, about 35 minutes. Cool completely.
Meanwhile, dissolve the remaining 2 teaspoons of espresso powder in the remaining 2 tablespoons of water in a medium bowl. Whisk in the vanilla. Add the powdered sugar and butter and whisk until smooth. Pour the glaze over the brownies. Refrigerate until the glaze is set. Cut into bite-size pieces. Arrange the brownies on a platter and serve.
Thursday, November 20, 2008
Sa-weet baby Jebus
"A woman in Seattle was recently surprised to find a black widow spider—the deadliest of American arachnids—at the bottom of a Costco container of California grapes. “I got to the bottom of it and all of a sudden…a spider came out! When I went online, it told me what it was—a black widow spider in my house.”
If the story sounds familiar, that’s because cases of spiders found nestled among California grapes have been growing more prevalent as farmers increasingly use the eight-legged freaks instead of pesticides to keep insects off of crops. “Some place in the U.S., almost every day of the year, somebody finds a black widow in a package of California grapes,” says spider expert Rod Crawford. Like those odds, organic produce fans?
The good news is that, despite their potential lethality, no one has actually died from a Black Widow bite in America since 1960. Those who would rather not encounter a venomous visitor from Cali should keep an eye out for suspicious webs when purchasing the fruit. Make sure you wash your produce in warm water—spider webs are poisonous, too!"
If the story sounds familiar, that’s because cases of spiders found nestled among California grapes have been growing more prevalent as farmers increasingly use the eight-legged freaks instead of pesticides to keep insects off of crops. “Some place in the U.S., almost every day of the year, somebody finds a black widow in a package of California grapes,” says spider expert Rod Crawford. Like those odds, organic produce fans?
The good news is that, despite their potential lethality, no one has actually died from a Black Widow bite in America since 1960. Those who would rather not encounter a venomous visitor from Cali should keep an eye out for suspicious webs when purchasing the fruit. Make sure you wash your produce in warm water—spider webs are poisonous, too!"
Oh Mah Gawd. 
Monday, November 17, 2008
And your finalists for Mom of the Year 2008 are.......
Finalist #1, Sugar, comes to us from the run down state of New Jersey where although she doesn't have a job to speak of, she's currently working on giving Levi (shown here in the back seat) a sibling in order to get more welfare dollars.
Finalist #2, Lanie, comes to us from suburban Detroit where she aspires to be an actress. Her self designed ink was inspired by her Creative Memories roller star stamper that she used to scrapbook the birth and 1st birthday of little Sasha shown in the background behind the dilapidated baby gate rescued from the neighbors trash.
Finalist #3, Tammy Faith (aka: Tawny Fawn at The Landing Strip out by the airport)can't thank her Dad enough for installing that stripper pole she got off Craig's List. When she's not mentoring girls with the Big Brother/Big Sister organization, she can be found watching Showgirls, her favorite movie of all time!
And the weiner of the 2008 Mom of the Year competition is.........
Finalist #2, Lanie, comes to us from suburban Detroit where she aspires to be an actress. Her self designed ink was inspired by her Creative Memories roller star stamper that she used to scrapbook the birth and 1st birthday of little Sasha shown in the background behind the dilapidated baby gate rescued from the neighbors trash.
Finalist #3, Tammy Faith (aka: Tawny Fawn at The Landing Strip out by the airport)can't thank her Dad enough for installing that stripper pole she got off Craig's List. When she's not mentoring girls with the Big Brother/Big Sister organization, she can be found watching Showgirls, her favorite movie of all time!
And the weiner of the 2008 Mom of the Year competition is.........
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
LISA FROM WEST VIRGINIA!!!!!!!!!
Congratulations Lisa for being the quintessential picture of motherhood. This captures the multi-tasking that all mothers strive to achieve but sadly, some never experience. Taking care of both men in your life earns not only our admiration but this coveted title of Mother of the Year.
Bravo Lisa!
Bravo Lisa!
Sunday, November 16, 2008
Bad Tip
Where the other day had a good tip, this is a BAAAAAD tip so don't do it.
"I don't know if anyone posted this one yet:)
I come from a long line of butchers and this is the only thing I learned:) If chicken or fish/shrimp is starting to stink, but not rotten put it into a bath of cold water with baking soda. Let it sit, stir it around and then rinse it off. The smell is gone and the it will taste fresh.
Also if I buy bright red steaks I let them age in my fridge. Brown meat tastes WAY better!"
"I don't know if anyone posted this one yet:)
I come from a long line of butchers and this is the only thing I learned:) If chicken or fish/shrimp is starting to stink, but not rotten put it into a bath of cold water with baking soda. Let it sit, stir it around and then rinse it off. The smell is gone and the it will taste fresh.
Also if I buy bright red steaks I let them age in my fridge. Brown meat tastes WAY better!"
Hello CPS?
Uh shitty mom alert!
So it's 7:30pm and....
Flying Monkey part duex says out loud, "I'm STARVING!"
I'm like, "Come on, you just.........(oh God, I forgot to feed the kids)"
"Uh, um ya, how would you like some toast and jelly?" (thinking that I cannot feed these kids anything big as they have to go to bed in like an hour)
So dinner consisted of:
3 pieces of salami each
1 cheese stick for Part Duex
1 slice of cheese for Uno
2 cups of water
7 pretzels with hummous for Part Duex
1/2 piece of fudge each
I suck.
Seriously.
So it's 7:30pm and....
Flying Monkey part duex says out loud, "I'm STARVING!"
I'm like, "Come on, you just.........(oh God, I forgot to feed the kids)"
"Uh, um ya, how would you like some toast and jelly?" (thinking that I cannot feed these kids anything big as they have to go to bed in like an hour)
So dinner consisted of:
3 pieces of salami each
1 cheese stick for Part Duex
1 slice of cheese for Uno
2 cups of water
7 pretzels with hummous for Part Duex
1/2 piece of fudge each
I suck.
Seriously.
Poke me in the eye with a hot poker
I've determined that I'm a masochist. Why else would I voluntarily take the kids to Jungle Java on a Sunday afternoon? There are probably 80 kids here, 68 of which are in some sort of screaming/crying/meltdown throwing fit and here I sit (on the computer of course, thanks for the wireless interent Jungle Java) in the midst of the chaos.
Oh wait....It all becomes crystal clear. It's the chaos. I'm attracted to chaos. I'm not masochistic after all.
Carry on then.
Oh wait....It all becomes crystal clear. It's the chaos. I'm attracted to chaos. I'm not masochistic after all.
Carry on then.
Saturday, November 15, 2008
Stressed is desserts spelled backwards but WTF good does that do me?
I'm so stressed. My dishwasher took a shit.
Riddle me this: why doesn't the appliance take a shit after completing it's work? Hmmm? For instance I had a washing machine that stopped working mid-cycle. I had to pull sopping wet towels from that bitch and wring them out and line dry them. What a PITA.
Enter my dishwasher. Yes, it's pretty old. Like maybe 12 years? Give or take a year or two. It's currently FULL of nasty dishes that were in the sink for at least 2 days (oh wipe that condescending look off your face. You know you've done the same) and now they sit fermenting in my piece of shit dishwasher.
Sigh. I really didn't have the money for this. I mean, DH did get his holiday check from work but I had other plans for that. Damn. You know (maybe YOU don't but trust me on this) that when I do get a new dishwasher and they come to install it, something will be fucked up and it'll end up costing me mo' money than just the machine. It always does.
I need to take two mommy's little helpers today. Oh and I regret to the end of the earth agreeing to work for someone tomorrow. Dammit.
Riddle me this: why doesn't the appliance take a shit after completing it's work? Hmmm? For instance I had a washing machine that stopped working mid-cycle. I had to pull sopping wet towels from that bitch and wring them out and line dry them. What a PITA.
Enter my dishwasher. Yes, it's pretty old. Like maybe 12 years? Give or take a year or two. It's currently FULL of nasty dishes that were in the sink for at least 2 days (oh wipe that condescending look off your face. You know you've done the same) and now they sit fermenting in my piece of shit dishwasher.
Sigh. I really didn't have the money for this. I mean, DH did get his holiday check from work but I had other plans for that. Damn. You know (maybe YOU don't but trust me on this) that when I do get a new dishwasher and they come to install it, something will be fucked up and it'll end up costing me mo' money than just the machine. It always does.
I need to take two mommy's little helpers today. Oh and I regret to the end of the earth agreeing to work for someone tomorrow. Dammit.
Friday, November 14, 2008
Now THIS is a good tip!
Courtesy of the Bargain Hunter's thread on Babycenter.com
Save your wrapping paper tubes. Cut a slit on one end about 2 inches. When you go to put your xmas lights away, start with the first light on the strand and slide it into the slit in the end of the tube. Now just wind your lights around the tube. Make sure when you get to the end to cut another slit at the other end and hook it. No more tangeled lights the next year. And it makes the super easy to put back on the tree the next year.
Save your wrapping paper tubes. Cut a slit on one end about 2 inches. When you go to put your xmas lights away, start with the first light on the strand and slide it into the slit in the end of the tube. Now just wind your lights around the tube. Make sure when you get to the end to cut another slit at the other end and hook it. No more tangeled lights the next year. And it makes the super easy to put back on the tree the next year.
BREAKING NEWS!!
You're not a dude unless you have a penis.
Seriously.
NOT.A.DUDE.
NOT.A.DUDE.PREGNANT
STOP.THE.INSANITY.
Seriously. I'm sick and tired of hearing this shit about a "man being pregnant". Proof #1: He's got no dick, therefore he's a CHICK who wants to be a dude. Albiet an ugly chick/dude too. Proof #2: No dude has a uterus therefore a DUDE CAN'T GET PREGNANT OR DELIVER A BABY.
Shame on Barbara Walters for perpetuating this ludicrous story which shouldn't even be a story. I'd rather hear about how Jennifer Aniston still wished Angelina Jolie were dead for stealing Brad Pitt.
Stop the friggen insanity!
Seriously.
NOT.A.DUDE.
NOT.A.DUDE.PREGNANT
STOP.THE.INSANITY.
Seriously. I'm sick and tired of hearing this shit about a "man being pregnant". Proof #1: He's got no dick, therefore he's a CHICK who wants to be a dude. Albiet an ugly chick/dude too. Proof #2: No dude has a uterus therefore a DUDE CAN'T GET PREGNANT OR DELIVER A BABY.
Shame on Barbara Walters for perpetuating this ludicrous story which shouldn't even be a story. I'd rather hear about how Jennifer Aniston still wished Angelina Jolie were dead for stealing Brad Pitt.
Stop the friggen insanity!
Thursday, November 13, 2008
You've come a long way baby!
Wine in a box.
Did you run from the room? Come back. This stuff has come a LONG way and with the holidays coming up, you'll need this for a cost cutting way to serve your holiday guests. The suggestions come from Robert Bohr, wine director at NYC Cru.
BEST Cabernet Sauvignon
Boho Vineyards 2005
BEST Merlot
Hardy's Stamp 2007
BEST Pinot Noir
Pinot Evil (My personal vote for cutest.name.ever.)
BEST Pinot Grigio
Angel Juice 2007
BEST Chardonnay
Banrock Station 2007
This is one of my fav's. It's really good plus I'm a lover of Cabernet Sauvignon.
Did you run from the room? Come back. This stuff has come a LONG way and with the holidays coming up, you'll need this for a cost cutting way to serve your holiday guests. The suggestions come from Robert Bohr, wine director at NYC Cru.
BEST Cabernet Sauvignon
Boho Vineyards 2005
BEST Merlot
Hardy's Stamp 2007
BEST Pinot Noir
Pinot Evil (My personal vote for cutest.name.ever.)
BEST Pinot Grigio
Angel Juice 2007
BEST Chardonnay
Banrock Station 2007
This is one of my fav's. It's really good plus I'm a lover of Cabernet Sauvignon.
Wednesday, November 12, 2008
Oh sweet baby Jesus, say it's so!
Arrested Development the movie?!?
ON-AGAIN, OFF-AGAIN 'ARRESTED' FILM ON-AGAIN • "The show was called 'Arrested Development' and no amount of superlatives can do the show justice. Let’s just say it was brilliant and move on. Since the show was cancelled, rumblings of a feature film based on the show have been reported every time any of the stars does an interview. Almost always…the star in question says I’d love to do one, but I’m waiting to hear from creator Mitch Hurwitz. Well…tonight is the night the story shifts into high gear! On the red carpet, Jeffrey [Tambor] told me he just spoke to Mitch and the movie is a go! He says Mitch Hurwitz spoke to him this week and while he didn’t know when the start date was, he said, 'when the writer/director calls you it’s a pretty good sign.'"
Oh please, please, please, please, please, please be true!
ON-AGAIN, OFF-AGAIN 'ARRESTED' FILM ON-AGAIN • "The show was called 'Arrested Development' and no amount of superlatives can do the show justice. Let’s just say it was brilliant and move on. Since the show was cancelled, rumblings of a feature film based on the show have been reported every time any of the stars does an interview. Almost always…the star in question says I’d love to do one, but I’m waiting to hear from creator Mitch Hurwitz. Well…tonight is the night the story shifts into high gear! On the red carpet, Jeffrey [Tambor] told me he just spoke to Mitch and the movie is a go! He says Mitch Hurwitz spoke to him this week and while he didn’t know when the start date was, he said, 'when the writer/director calls you it’s a pretty good sign.'"
Oh please, please, please, please, please, please be true!
Saturday, November 8, 2008
I'm all outta love
So am I the only person on earth who ISN'T in love with her Dyson? I wasn't really sold on it when I got it as it didn't seem to suck worth a damn (that's what she said!) but I did notice that it took a minute or so (literally) for the thing to "grab" the carpet and then it did clean pretty well.
Until last week.
We had just cleaned the brush on the bottom of enough hair to transplant Yule Brenner and it worked fine. The next day when I went to use it, it just wouldn't "grab" and clean anything up from the carpet. WTF? So my Dyson lovin' BFF suggested that we clean the filter out as that happened to her. So we did. The damn thing still isn't working right. I've had this thing for maybe 2 years and trust me when I say that it's FAR from being worn out from being used too much. I find it a bit high maintenance. Even if it didn't crap out on me, I just never fell head over heels in love with it. I got it for a pretty good deal but still more than I would have paid for a "normal" vacuume. I find that it doesn't really even work good on bare floors.
This is pretty costly regret. I hate that.
Until last week.
We had just cleaned the brush on the bottom of enough hair to transplant Yule Brenner and it worked fine. The next day when I went to use it, it just wouldn't "grab" and clean anything up from the carpet. WTF? So my Dyson lovin' BFF suggested that we clean the filter out as that happened to her. So we did. The damn thing still isn't working right. I've had this thing for maybe 2 years and trust me when I say that it's FAR from being worn out from being used too much. I find it a bit high maintenance. Even if it didn't crap out on me, I just never fell head over heels in love with it. I got it for a pretty good deal but still more than I would have paid for a "normal" vacuume. I find that it doesn't really even work good on bare floors.
This is pretty costly regret. I hate that.
Friday, November 7, 2008
uh...Merry Christmas?
I'm a big supporter of the Scholastic books that come out monthly at the Flying Monkey's schools. They always have like 2 different books in the catalog that are only $1 and I always buy like 5 of them to have on hand for birthday's, donations, gifts, etc. I really love the Scholastic book program. In the years past, I've purchased the gift certificate for $4 that entitle the bearer to a free book and I've given those gift certificates to the Flying Monkey's teachers for their Christmas gifts. The gift certificates are only offered in November and I ordered two of them for Flying Monkey Part Duex's two teachers. Imagine my surprise when I received the November book order today with two little pre-printed notes with fill-in the blanks for a To: name and From: name thanking Part Duex for his gift certificates.
Uh...wha?
Yah, the teacher apparently took the liberty of taking the gift certificates and gave us the "thank you" note. I've never had that happen before. I've always gotten the certificates and given them out when I wanted. I'm pretty irritated to be honest. I kinda feel bad for Part Duex because he won't be bringing the teachers a gift (that was my kids favorite part...taking their teacher a gift that they wrapped all by themselves) since they already took it. I know it wasn't done intentionally but seriously. Seriously.
Merry Christmas then.
Uh...wha?
Yah, the teacher apparently took the liberty of taking the gift certificates and gave us the "thank you" note. I've never had that happen before. I've always gotten the certificates and given them out when I wanted. I'm pretty irritated to be honest. I kinda feel bad for Part Duex because he won't be bringing the teachers a gift (that was my kids favorite part...taking their teacher a gift that they wrapped all by themselves) since they already took it. I know it wasn't done intentionally but seriously. Seriously.
Merry Christmas then.
Friday Food
Num Num Num
Creamy Chicken Burritos
3 chicken breasts, cooked and shredded
8 oz cream cheese
1 cup medium salsa
1/4 tsp garlic powder
1 can pinto beans, drained
1 1/2 cups shredded Cheddar cheese
6 flour tortilla
Preheat oven to 350. Grease a 9x13 baking dish. Add cream cheese and salsa to large sauce pan. Cook over medium heat until cheese is melted and blended with salsa. Add garlic, beans and chicken. Mix well. Fill tortillas, roll up and place in baking dish. Mixture will be a bit runny so be careful not to burn yourself filling tortillas. Sprinkle burritos with cheese cover with foil and bake 20 minutes. Remove foil and bake an additional 10 minutes.
Wednesday, November 5, 2008
Diet is DIE with a T
So I was talking to this doctor I work with the other day. We got on the subject of food/diet/nutrition and he said that he read something recently that made total sense when it came to eating/dieting.
Using a scale of 1-10, 1 being the most hungry you've ever been (like eat your young hungry) and 10 being the most full (like ready to shove your finger down your throat full), you should live your days between 3 and 5. Interesting isn't it? So this means that eating multiple times a day is necessary. Not large amounts of food, but enough to keep you between 3 and 5.
I've decided to try this. In between feedings, I pledge to drink water. I got off the water wagon and I need to get back on...STAT!
Lemme know if you try this and what you think.
Using a scale of 1-10, 1 being the most hungry you've ever been (like eat your young hungry) and 10 being the most full (like ready to shove your finger down your throat full), you should live your days between 3 and 5. Interesting isn't it? So this means that eating multiple times a day is necessary. Not large amounts of food, but enough to keep you between 3 and 5.
I've decided to try this. In between feedings, I pledge to drink water. I got off the water wagon and I need to get back on...STAT!
Lemme know if you try this and what you think.
You know what's gotta suck?
Gettin' those McCain/Palin stickers off a car.
I never, ever understood why someone would
a) put a political bumper sticker on their vehicle that was newer than say 2005 (rational being that if you have a car older than 2004 it's prolly a beater anyway and who cares how many bumper stickers you have on the hooptie)
and
b) why in the HELL someone would put the sticker on their PAINTED portion of the car vs. the actual plastic bumper.
Have fun getting the sticker off without taking the paint with it. You can try Goo Gone. It worked getting the Thomas the Train sticker Flying Monkey Part Duex put on my freshly painted wall. The sticker was on there for a while. It took some time for me to notice it then some more time to corner him and spanked the crap outta him. Go ahead and call CPS, you think a foster family would put up with stickers on freshly painted walls? I think not.
Here is something to occupy your time while the Goo Gone works.
I never, ever understood why someone would
a) put a political bumper sticker on their vehicle that was newer than say 2005 (rational being that if you have a car older than 2004 it's prolly a beater anyway and who cares how many bumper stickers you have on the hooptie)
and
b) why in the HELL someone would put the sticker on their PAINTED portion of the car vs. the actual plastic bumper.
Have fun getting the sticker off without taking the paint with it. You can try Goo Gone. It worked getting the Thomas the Train sticker Flying Monkey Part Duex put on my freshly painted wall. The sticker was on there for a while. It took some time for me to notice it then some more time to corner him and spanked the crap outta him. Go ahead and call CPS, you think a foster family would put up with stickers on freshly painted walls? I think not.
Here is something to occupy your time while the Goo Gone works.
Tuesday, November 4, 2008
How Martha is THIS?
I'm hosting Thanksgiving for the 1st time in like 10 years. I've worked EVERY Thanksgiving and this year I decided to actually stay home and be thankful for what I have, instead of being thankful for time and a half while working. So...I'm micromanaging my menu, it's what I do best, and I came across this darling appetizer!
Turkey Cheese Ball
Ingredients:
2 packages (8 ounces each) reduced-fat cream cheese
6 ounces deli smoked turkey, finely chopped
1 cup (4 ounces) shredded cheddar cheese
1 tablespoon finely chopped onion
1 tablespoon Worcestershire sauce
1/2 teaspoon garlic powder
DECORATIONS:
3 packages (3 ounces each) cream cheese, softened
2 tablespoons milk
Brown, orange and yellow paste food coloring
6 large oval crackers
1 large sweet red pepper
1 small yellow summer squash
1 cup pecan halves
Assorted crackers
Directions: In a small mixing bowl, beat the first six ingredients until combined. Shape into a ball; wrap in plastic wrap. Refrigerate for 1 hour or until firm.
In a small mixing bowl, beat cream cheese and milk until smooth. Divide among four small bowls. With food coloring, tint one bowl brown, one dark orange and one light orange (using yellow and orange); leave one bowl plain. Transfer each mixture to a heavy-duty resealable plastic bag; cut a small hole in a corner of each bag.
For turkey tail feathers, decorate the top halves of large oval crackers with tinted cream cheese.
Using the red pepper, form the turkey head, neck and snood. For beak, cut a small triangle from summer squash; attach with cream cheese. Add eyes, using brown and plain cream cheese. Insert pecan halves and decorated crackers into cheese ball. Serve with assorted crackers.
Yield: 1 cheese ball (3 cups).
Editor’s Note: This recipe was tested with Townhouse Oval Bistro crackers.
Turkey Cheese Ball
Ingredients:
2 packages (8 ounces each) reduced-fat cream cheese
6 ounces deli smoked turkey, finely chopped
1 cup (4 ounces) shredded cheddar cheese
1 tablespoon finely chopped onion
1 tablespoon Worcestershire sauce
1/2 teaspoon garlic powder
DECORATIONS:
3 packages (3 ounces each) cream cheese, softened
2 tablespoons milk
Brown, orange and yellow paste food coloring
6 large oval crackers
1 large sweet red pepper
1 small yellow summer squash
1 cup pecan halves
Assorted crackers
Directions: In a small mixing bowl, beat the first six ingredients until combined. Shape into a ball; wrap in plastic wrap. Refrigerate for 1 hour or until firm.
In a small mixing bowl, beat cream cheese and milk until smooth. Divide among four small bowls. With food coloring, tint one bowl brown, one dark orange and one light orange (using yellow and orange); leave one bowl plain. Transfer each mixture to a heavy-duty resealable plastic bag; cut a small hole in a corner of each bag.
For turkey tail feathers, decorate the top halves of large oval crackers with tinted cream cheese.
Using the red pepper, form the turkey head, neck and snood. For beak, cut a small triangle from summer squash; attach with cream cheese. Add eyes, using brown and plain cream cheese. Insert pecan halves and decorated crackers into cheese ball. Serve with assorted crackers.
Yield: 1 cheese ball (3 cups).
Editor’s Note: This recipe was tested with Townhouse Oval Bistro crackers.
Monday, November 3, 2008
Why yes, I WOULD like some cheese with my whine
So I worked out with my personal trainer on Saturday morning. Usually I have a "no workout" policy if I'm working a stretch but this was the only day I could fit her in so I went a head and did it even though I worked nights all weekend.
Big shitty mistake.
Why don't I listen to myself? Ugh. so I'm sore as a mo-fo Sat. night which is BAD because I'm usually not sore until the next day so I knew I was in some trouble. Then I get into work and discover that we had a call in. GD. That means a double assignment for me. Just my luck that I was literally running right outta the gate. Oh and did I mention that Sat night was also the time change? Yah, I got to work 13 hours of misery instead of 12. Woot!
I get home and sleep like shit. Back to work I go. Now at least we have a full staff. We're busy again in the ER. Then, at like 230am, I hear Code Blue. Sonofabitch. So I get to do CPfriggenR on a 82 y/o who's deader than dead and puking poop (yes, I'm serious) outta her mouth allllllll over the friggen bead, floor, nurses and my lazy ass co-workers (not I said the fly. I have this uncanny ability to sense the eruption of Mount Puke Helen and I shoved the patients face away from me all the while doing some bad ass chest compressions while my pec's BURNED from the additional workout they were receiving on the cusp of the HELLACIOUS workout they already received on Sat....Whew!) Needless to say, the patient expired. A big Fuck You to the 12 or so people who stood around and watched while the nursing supervisor and I did compressions for 25 min. Thanks for volunteering to help you big lazy fat asses.
Karma bitches.
I'm hurting now. I locked my knees during the festivities and feel like I've been run over. I will stand by my motto NOT to work out on the eve of a stretch. Never again.
It could be worse though. I could be in the hospital morgue like Mrs. Patient.
Big shitty mistake.
Why don't I listen to myself? Ugh. so I'm sore as a mo-fo Sat. night which is BAD because I'm usually not sore until the next day so I knew I was in some trouble. Then I get into work and discover that we had a call in. GD. That means a double assignment for me. Just my luck that I was literally running right outta the gate. Oh and did I mention that Sat night was also the time change? Yah, I got to work 13 hours of misery instead of 12. Woot!
I get home and sleep like shit. Back to work I go. Now at least we have a full staff. We're busy again in the ER. Then, at like 230am, I hear Code Blue. Sonofabitch. So I get to do CPfriggenR on a 82 y/o who's deader than dead and puking poop (yes, I'm serious) outta her mouth allllllll over the friggen bead, floor, nurses and my lazy ass co-workers (not I said the fly. I have this uncanny ability to sense the eruption of Mount Puke Helen and I shoved the patients face away from me all the while doing some bad ass chest compressions while my pec's BURNED from the additional workout they were receiving on the cusp of the HELLACIOUS workout they already received on Sat....Whew!) Needless to say, the patient expired. A big Fuck You to the 12 or so people who stood around and watched while the nursing supervisor and I did compressions for 25 min. Thanks for volunteering to help you big lazy fat asses.
Karma bitches.
I'm hurting now. I locked my knees during the festivities and feel like I've been run over. I will stand by my motto NOT to work out on the eve of a stretch. Never again.
It could be worse though. I could be in the hospital morgue like Mrs. Patient.
Dear You Dumb Broad at Panera Bread,
FYI in case you were wondering, your kid is fat because you feed it chocolate chip cookies at 7:30 am on a school day no less.
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