A big bowl of nasty with a gag me spoon

Oh god I have the grossest job sometimes.

I went into this patients room to give her a breathing treatment and she was FREAKING out about a colonoscopy that she was going to have later that morning. I said not to worry because the prep is waaaaaay worse than the actual procedure and they give you good drugs to make you not care that someone has a reallllly looooong scope up your butt. She proceeds to almost start crying (she's got a psych history) and saying, "what if I don't wake up? What if I stop breathing?" I said you don't have anything to worry about so stop stressing out about it and take your damn treatment so I can get outta this psycho ass room! (Ok so I didn't say that but I wanted to).

Anywho, she proceeds to tell me that she had red jello last night and look what happened.....(you know how things happen in slow motion? Like you KNOW what's gonna happen but you can't react with your body fast enough? Yah, that's what is about to happen to me) she proceeds to grab a washcloth that was on her tray table and open it up to show me some red stained shit. I'm not fucking kidding. Not.fucking.kidding. Then, if that wasn't bad enough, she kept sticking her fingers all over it saying "Look! Look!" and turning it over to where there was more red stained shit. Here's where my body/brain reaction failed me. She then grabbed my arm with the same god damn shitty hand to say, "Do you think that's blood?" I yelled it's "jello stained poo" as I was running, R-U-N-N-I-N-G to the bathroom to scald my arm with the hottest water I could muster up. I then ran to the bleach wipes and scrubbed my entire forearm down. I swear to Bob I almost fucking puked. I've got a pretty strong stomach from working in a hospital so long but O...M....G.

I don't get paid enough. Not nearly enough. Sweet Baby Jesus.